MAILING LIST 
Vital Worship
Feature Stories ... for inspiration, learning and group discussion
Print this story for study and discussion 
|
Text by Joan Huyser-Honig
Photography by Steve Huyser-Honig
Splitting into age-divided worship each Sunday doesn’t necessarily result in kids who go on to choose worship as adults. That’s why Carolyn C. Brown and several pastors are talking about intergenerational worship.
Ask preachers about services they remember from childhood, and common themes emerge. Sri Lankan Charles Jansz recalls sermons on David and Goliath and Daniel in the lions’ den, both illustrated on flannel graph. The preacher dressed in costume for one sermon and had kids act out the story in the other.
In This Story Profile: CAROLYN C. BROWN |
Canadian Peter Bush was only eight when a preacher told about a man who had little room left in his suitcase, but still needed to pack a light, a sword, a book of poetry, a collection of letters, and a history book. The solution? He packed a Bible.
American Dave Poolman remembers narrating a Christmas play, choosing songs for a hymn sing, singing in children’s choir, and watching the pastor and church leaders burn the church mortgage papers during a service of thanksgiving.
Visuals and personal involvement made those services powerful. But the pastors’ memories depend on something deeper—being present in worship with people of all ages.
Congregations are all over the map on when they expect children or youth to attend an entire service. In some churches it doesn’t happen till high school graduation. Read on to discover why and how churches are making it a priority to engage children in worship, especially in sermons and prayers.
 Charles Jansz, who attended a Calvin Symposium on Worship, says that Sri Lankan Christians keep the family together in church. |
There is no separate children’s worship among Dutch Reformed churches in Sri Lanka. “We follow what is called ‘the unified plan of worship.’ Culturally, Sri Lankans are very strong on the family being together,” says Charles Jansz, a pastor in Colombo, the capital city.
“There is most of the time a bit of explanation about the Scriptures being read, which is helpful even to the adults. We use different versions and often ask the children to read,” he adds.
While preaching, he may include a visual prop or provide a printed sermon help for kids, like pictures to color or fill-in-the-blanks for the sermon text and theme. He tells stories that help kids apply the sermon and, directly addressing a child by name, asks simple questions. Kids often do sermon skits for special occasions.
The church bulletin highlights exam times and other children’s concerns. “Either the pastor or a Sunday school teacher prays specifically for such concerns. There are also special prayers, led by a pastor or someone else, that children are asked to pray audibly,” Jansz says.
Small churches may have an intergenerational advantage, according to Peter Bush, pastor of Knox Presbyterian in Mitchell, Ontario, and co-author of Where 20 or 30 Are Gathered: Leading Worship in the Small Church.
Peter Bush |
“Small churches have a sense that the children belong to all of them, so they’re thrilled to see ‘their’ kids reading Scripture. There’s a family atmosphere that makes it easier for the congregation to accept clear attempts to reach children.
“And maybe in a small church, it’s easier for kids to sit through worship that meets the older generation’s needs…because Mrs. Smith calls them by name and Mr. Park, who loves this hymn with strange words, gives them a mint on Sunday,” Bush says.
Six or more intergenerational services a year prepare Knox Presbyterian kids to become full-time attendees by grade eight. During these services, kids read Scripture, participate in drama, or enjoy a retelling of the Bible passage during the sermon.
Service planners think through what the sermon will mean to each age group, such as the Sermon on the Mount advice to settle disputes with a brother or sister before coming to worship. Bush may give kids a sermon-related task, like drawing a picture of something they’re thankful for. They bring forward their lists and pictures to be included in the pastoral prayer.
 Worshiping with adults helps kids feel like part of the family of God. |
When Dennis Scheibmeir arrived as pastor of First Presbyterian Church in Larned, Kansas, his three teens doubled the youth group. Only one family in the tiny church brought children to worship.
Now there are up to eight kids, third grade or younger, in worship. “The congregation is thrilled! On Easter, children will help roll away a (fake) stone from the tomb. We’ve finally got enough children to put on a Christmas program,” Scheibmeir says.
During the school year, kids often gather around the pastor for the Scripture reading and an object lesson based on the text. Then they leave for children’s church. But they’ll probably stay in for the whole service during summer, as vacations reduce the number of kids and teachers.
At Princeton Christian Reformed Church in Kentwood, Michigan, children join their families for worship by second grade. Pastor Dave Poolman is always looking for new ways to include them.
He’s invited kids to do dramatic readings during praise and confession. Teens have co-led the congregational prayer, one person per section for praise, confession, thanks, and petition.
 Pre-teens can do a good job of leading a Scripture reading. |
“I try to keep kids engaged by using stories, illustrations, and language they can understand. I avoid excessive use of ‘big words’ and theological terms. When I use them, I explain them. I write my sermons as if I am preaching to a 12- to 15-year-old who isn’t interested. If I can get that kid to listen, everyone else will understand what God is saying to them,” Poolman says.
It’s up to parents at Fredericktown United Methodist to decide whether to worship with their children or send them to Junior Church, offered three Sundays a month through fifth grade. Fourth Sundays, though, involve the whole family in this Ohio congregation.
While leading a project to teach Fredericktown parents and kids about worship, Mary Elder noticed that the “congregation was really drawn to the message of a drama given by three generations of one family.” Families also enjoyed creating pieces of banners that now hang in the sanctuary.
The latest idea is to start an Ask the Pastor option. “Parents and Sunday school teachers say kids sometimes ask questions that are difficult to answer. Students can put their questions in a box or jar. The pastor will help decide how to address these during worship,” Elder says.
CAROLYN C. BROWN on worship as a true family table Years ago, while minister of education in a large church, Carolyn C. Brown was negotiating a schedule conflict between church school and children’s choir. She recalls backing down when the children’s choir director said, “Let’s get real. Children often fall away from church during college. But if they come back to any church—and have been in my choir—they’ll feel comfortable in a sanctuary. And they may even join a new choir.” Realizing that the same transference wouldn’t apply between children’s ministries and adult worship, Brown acquiesced. “Roman Catholics use Psalms weekly in church during the Liturgy of the Word. We sing a psalm that fits the lectionary. Sometimes the children sing a seasonal psalm or a common theme psalm. In church the refrains are sung by the congregation, and the cantor sings the verses. Therefore the refrain remains in your thoughts and heart for weeks,” says Grace Schwanda, who directs four children’s choirs at St. Robert of Newminster Catholic Church in Ada, Michigan.
But this intergenerational experience of spiritual formation doesn’t happen in churches that split age groups for worship. “The Lord’s table doesn’t look like a family table when we’re worshiping in age-divided groups. Let’s gather the whole family around the table and cook up some worship,” urges Brown, now an author and intergenerational ministry consultant. Leaders in churches with separate worship groups sometimes confide their regrets. They tell of 22-year-olds who don’t know their way around a sanctuary and feel that—compared to children’s church and youth worship—church for grownups is like landing on Mars. “Even 13 is a lousy age to come into intergenerational worship, because you’re more interested in your peers,” Brown says. She recommends ages 7 to 11 as the window of opportunity. Youngsters want to be in on what adults are doing. “The people up front should look like the people in the pews. Leading worship is a way to experience yourself as God’s people in a way you cannot experience in the pews,” Brown says. Educate parents about kids and worship You wouldn’t expect to have a baby and then, for 18 years, eat next to your child with no interaction. It’s the same with worship. Brown says to expect “wonderful moments…and disasters.” First grade is a good time to bring parents and children together to learn what worship means. For an hour or two—perhaps during the church school or summer recess—they can do joint activities and find out about the whole sequence of a service, from praise, confession, and God’s word to our response and the order of communion. “The announced purpose is to teach children about worship, but parents learn, too,” Brown says. That rings true for Mary Elder, who organized family worship education at Fredericktown United Methodist. “Parents get insight. They reassess their expectations of their children after learning about developmental stages. They understand why children ask the questions they do. Those questions shape how we think about worship. And thinking about how to influence their children’s worship helps parents reflect on their own worship,” she says. Brown advises parents to focus on participation, not discipline. “Hang off on behavior concerns on the ride home. First talk about what you sang, prayed, or learned in worship. Give kids tips on how to do things, like use a hymnal. “Clergy and worship leaders need to make clear that it’s okay for parents and children to whisper gently in worship, especially when there’s a sermon point for kids. Kids may get a little wiggly. That’s all okay, within limits, as long as everyone around them can still hear the service,” Brown says. Plan sermons with all ages in mind Brown likes to say that 70-year-olds are no more 30-year-olds with white hair than 7-year-olds are pint-sized adults. Continuing her family table metaphor, she compares worship to cooking up a big feast where each person will find at least one dish to like—and you have to try a bite of everything served. “Maybe sermons, instead of using sequential points, need to have a point for each age group,” she says. As Mary Hulst, a Christian Reformed preacher, suggests, “Weave the images of iPods and Nintendos with AARP and aching joints so that everybody knows that this sermon is for them.”
After deciding on a theme or text, but before beginning to write, preachers should ask what a child needs to understand the sermon. “Do they need to know certain vocabulary? How might this text play in a child’s world? Consider Abraham not quite sacrificing Isaac. Adults hear, ‘Give God your very best. Trust God.’ Kids think, “Oh, my goodness. Would God ask my parents to kill me? And would they do it?’ ” Brown says. It’s enough to seed each sermon with one thing to grab children’s attention. This might be an illustration from childhood, prop, children’s literature reference, or a lily bulb to hold during Easter worship. The kids’ point doesn’t have to be at the beginning of the sermon. “Parents can clue kids in when something’s relevant. Little heads pop up all over the sanctuary when the preacher says something to them. They listen as long as they can and then tune out. The goal is they’ll turn into sermon listeners,” Brown says. |
 Dave Poolman has used Rembrandt’s painting “The Return of the Prodigal Son” as a prop during a sermon. Public domain image from Wikipedia. |
Don’t miss the bonus story on more tips for engaging children in worship.
Read about intergenerational unity at Princeton Christian Reformed Church and family worship education at Fredericktown United Methodist Church. Listen to an interview with Charles Jansz about Christians in Sri Lanka.
Listen to excerpts from an interview with Carolyn C. Brown on engaging kids in worship.
Read Carolyn C. Brown’s practical books on engaging children in worship:
- Forbid Them Not: Involving Children in Sunday Worship (one volume for each lectionary year)
- Sharing the Easter Faith with Children: Helping Children Observe Lent and Celebrate Easter
- You Can Preach to the Kids, Too
Book her for a workshop or conference to help your church or denominational region think through new ways to include different generations in worship.
Expand your thinking on worship for children by reading about 50 ways to honor children in your congregation, pre-Boomer norms in worship, and why churches include kids in worship or opt for children’s church.
Check out these resources on including children in worship from Congregational Resources and Calvin Institute of Christian Worship, including these books.
Sign up for a Friends of the Groom workshop for ideas on engaging kids through scripture dramas.
Browse related stories on children’s choirs, designing worship together, intergenerational worship, preaching aids, and rural churches.
Feel free to print and distribute these stories at your council, worship, or education committee meeting. These questions will get members talking:
- At what age do children join worship for the entire service in your congregation? What are the blessings and risks in your approach?
- How would you describe the unstated norms in your church regarding acceptable behavior for children and youth in worship?
- In what ways and how often do children and teens help lead worship in your church?
- What three things might you do to make worship more welcoming and inclusive for your younger members?
What is the best way you’ve found to bring all ages together to, in Carolyn C. Brown’s words, “cook up some worship”? Please write to us so we can identify trends and share your great ideas. Whether you do these or any other things, we’d love to learn what works for you:
- If you developed a method of educating parents and children about worship, will you share those resources with us?
- Have you created a system, formal or informal, to track kids as they move from one age division of ministry to the next (e.g. nursery, children’s worship, church school, intergenerational worship, youth group, college ministry, etc.)?
- Which books, magazines, videos, websites, seminars, or other resources have you found most helpful in writing sermons that include something for every age group?
The external links from this site are provided for your convenience and are not necessarily endorsed by the Calvin Institute of Christian Worship.
CICW web story reprint policy:
You have permission to reprint this article (or other stories in this collection) in its entirety, in print or online. Before the title of the article, please reprint the following permission statement. If you are reprinting online, please link to the website listed.
This article was first published by the Calvin Institute of Christian Worship,
http://www.calvin.edu/worship/.
See collection of stories.