Monday, August 17, 2009

i used to have a locker

And now let us welcome the new year, full of things that have never been.—Rainer Maria Rilke

I was always the kid who began missing long division sometime around August.

Long division and cool white paper and the smell of erasers. The afternoons would grow longer, and the cicadas buzzed louder and louder. I wanted again the strange sanity of seven classes in a day. Even the challenge of homework looked appealing. (That appeal never lasted a month into school, though.)

So what do I do now? No school in my future (that I can tell), but the buses have been trundling past today, and my cousins and friends are all heading back to one school or another. Graduate classes, teaching classes, off to college for the first time, off to high school for the last…

Meanwhile I flick on my computer and stare down this novel that has decided to outlive me.

... No, it won’t do. I need to find some way to quench the back-to-school urge. Some way that doesn’t cost… Um, or take time…

Maybe I’ll just have to get over it. Maybe I’ll just write my brains out, and within a week, I’ll forget all about long division and clean folders and backpacks that still smell like the store…

Or maybe it will just rain, and I’ll bury myself in a Victorian mystery with a cup of coffee. And forget all about August and September and the way things were…—jl

Posted by Jenn Langefeld on 08/17 at 03:33 PM
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