Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Is it ever “Just Coffee?”
Is it ever “just coffee”?
That’s the question that the Calvin Sexuality Series coordinators want to answer for students in a two part panel on dating, singleness and relationships.
Calvin’s Sexuality Series began after a student survey and climate study in 2004, which showed that students wanted “more opportunities to discuss sexuality, but didn’t want more classes for credit.”
The affirmations of the sexuality series team consists of several people ranging from Broene counselors, student life administration and those who are worship coordinators in the chapel.
The point of the Sexuality Series is to get students and faculty talking about human sexuality in a Bible-based setting with open-mindedness and the ability discuss questions openly.
The panel of speakers focused primarily on the dating culture at Calvin and also several issues Calvin students face who stay single.
The panel was three Calvin students and three of Calvin’s administration. When asked the question of the night, “Is it ever just coffee?” Senior Rachael DeKraker said “I don’t think coffee is ever just coffee; it needs to be defined better.”
Beets-Veenstra RD Matt Cook’s wife Megan answered that “Coffee for one person might not meet the same thing for the other person; for you it might be ‘just coffee,’ but for that other person it could mean something totally different.”
The speakers also addressed the culture of singleness versus dating at Calvin. Several of the speakers mentioned that there was a lot of pressure to date, not necessarily from friends, but from the greater Calvin community. “If you’re just friends with a guy, and people see you doing a lot of stuff together, you get pegged as a couple very quickly here,” said Senior Deborah Lemmen.
Nalini Suganandam was also on the panel, and after working with students for several years in admissions, student life and now in Christian Formation, said that “There is an obvious difference between freshmen and seniors in the Calvin community. Freshmen want to date right now, so they do, and seniors who are heading out are always asked “are you pearled?” or “are you engaged?” – the focus changes as time goes on.”