Wednesday, November 16, 2005
Common People and complex gear
Black holes, Steven Hawkins told us they exist now scientists have figured out how to make them. Not sure what they may be used for since they are almost none existent. If you could make bill gates income for as long as they exist than you could buy a hamburger. I mean what’s the big deal, so we made a black hole, we can’t use it for anything. Its like a Furbie, it has no use.
What if the average deadbeat got hold of this black hole? He could say something like this, “there goes the bills, and I never got them.” Or he might say this, “here goes the ex wife, I don’t owe anyone alimony.” He wouldn’t have a trash bill either; he could just toss it to that corner of the kitchen. He would be busy though; he would constantly be trying to pull his dog out from getting stuck half way in. The In-Laws would never present a problem. He might even find a way to harness the black hole to a mower or something for an ingenious way of getting rid of fall leaves.
Lets take that power and give it to someone who is good now. The Dyson’s vacuum man would love to get his hands on this little black hole. Forget all that science about tornados and harnessing the natural forces of nature. He would have a new slogan, “sucks like there is a black hole down in there,” instead of, “never loses suction.” That old creepy Orcaen man would be left in the dust with his bowling ball tricks. The boys at Bissel would have a crack team of spies. The market would be trying to get the crazy Dutch guy.
Forget the rest what would a pimp do with a black hole? If the pimp was being chased by the Po Po’s he might pull it out and throw it one the ground. The cops would fall in and he would be free to go about his business. A pimp could use it instead of a slap. A ho gets out of line, slap, the black hole. A dead beat doesn’t pay, slap, the black hole. Whitie steps on your turf, slap, the black hole. You see a rival pimp, slap, the black hole.
What about a student at college? The average student would figure out that they no longer needed a dog to have an excuses for homework, they could instead say, “My black hole ate my homework.” It would be a perfect place for the pesky roommate that eats all your food or talks on the phone until the wee hours of the morning. You could also use it to get rid of the competition if you were looking for a wife or husband. You would no longer have to worry about the dean anymore either. If he decided you were not doing good enough in your classes you could accidentally nudge him into your black hole. Eventually the new dean would learn that you were not a student to be taken lightly. You would, “walk softly and carry a big stick.”
Now give that black hole to the people who you would least like to see have that kind of power, the government. The government would no longer need a scapegoat every time someone in congress decided to ask for documents, they just wouldn’t exist. They would also be able to hide every imaginable program from the general public; we would have no idea what area 51 is. If you get too nosy you would be helped to the nearest black hole by two thugs. The government would also never have to hide secret programs. If a program was discovered they could throw all of that project into the black hole and there would be no record that it every existed, and if some civilian had some proof they would be in that same black hole in a heart beat.
I can only hope that scientist give strong consideration to why we would need a black hole. There are so many uses for one and almost all that I can imagine are bad. It easily has the potential to become the next atom bomb. I am glad that it only exists for that very small instance. The world is not ready for that kind of power to be given to a person or party. Anyways the center of our universe is a black hole that is slowly destroying our own universe, shouldn’t we be worried about how that fits into intelligent design?